Each and every one of us is totally responsible for our reality. I know that might be hard to swallow for some of you, but...it's true. And, it's absolutely empowering.
Accepting that we are totally responsible for our reality, there is a process that I find very helpful and very effective when dealing with problematic situations. It's called Self-I-Dentity through Ho'oponopono or SITH. The website is: http://www.self-i-dentity-through-hooponopono.com. I use it all the time and would recommend trying it. What do you have to lose?
The first time I heard about SITH, was through a story that I read online about the experience of Dr. Hew Len Ihaleakala and his use of the process while working at a crowded facility for the mentally disabled. He never met with any of the patients, but managed to heal all of them by taking full responsibility for their conditions and healing them through healing himself.
He would go through the case files of the mental patients, see what their problems were, own those problems as existing within himself and being outpictured in his reality through the patients, and then work on healing himself. His process worked so well that all the patients recovered and the facility ended up being closed because it was no longer necessary to keep it open without any patients to fill it.
I have taken a class in Self I-Dentity Ho'oponopono from Dr. Ihaleakala and find the process to be easy to apply and surprising in its effectiveness. The process was initially developed by a Hawaiian Kahuna named Morrnah Nalamaku Simeona. She has since passed on, but Dr. Ihaleakala was her student and is now the master teacher of the process.
The process starts with taking responsibility for whatever is happening in your life. When a problem or difficulty arises you see it as the reflection of something that needs to be healed in you. And, the first thing you do is bring love into the equation. You say, "I love you." The "I love you" meaning that you love yourself and anyone involved with the situation you're focusing on. Since everyone and everything is an aspect and expression of the One, when you say "I love you" you're saying it to all of creation. You're setting the unfolding of the healing to happen in love. I love you.
The second step of the process is to say, "I'm sorry." The "I'm sorry" is basically about being sorry for whatever it is within you that is causing the problem to show up in your reality. You don't need to know what it is in you that's causing the problem, you just need to take responsibility for it, and then apologize. By the apology you are stating that you are willing to let it go...whatever the "it" is.
The third step of the process is to say, "Please forgive me." You're asking yourself to forgive yourself, even though it looks like something happened to you, or someone else did something you think is wrong. The solution is in self-forgiveness. The forgiveness is the acceptance and the letting go...the release.
The fourth and last step of the process is to say, "Thank you." No matter what happens, if we end up in a state of gratitude, the problem is gone. Gratitude is a key attitude. When we're truly grateful, we're relaxed, open, humble and connected with the Divine. And, by giving thanks, we accept that the healing is done.
Four simple steps:
1) I love you
2) I'm sorry
3) Please forgive me
4) Thank you
Everyone can remember these four steps. And, these four steps can and will change your life. But, we have to be willing to take full responsibility for everything that shows up in our reality...whatever it is, whoever it is, whatever it looks like, however it comes...everything. Once we accept that premise, then we move into love. From a loving place we apologize for our miscreation, we ask for forgiveness, and then give thanks. We accept and love ourselves no matter what has happened. We forgive ourselves and move into a state of gratitude. Thank you. Amen. And, so it is. Done.
What is important to mention is that you might have to do these steps over and over and over for a while in order to attain the states necessary to gain results. How do you know when it's working? You feel peace. You feel internal quiet. You feel resolution. So, keep repeating the steps until you feel release. And, if you do the steps sincerely, release will come.
So...give it a try. Why not? It can only help. Love...repentance...forgiveness...gratitude...release. Simple and powerful. So powerful.