We are in the midst of experiencing our largest solar flare (CME - Coronal Mass Ejection) ever. CME's travel at about one million miles an hour. The earth is close to 93 million miles from the sun. The full impact of this most recent CME hit the earth last night. I don't know how you experienced it, but I felt it very strongly, and will for some time to come.
I didn't notice the disruption of any household electronics, although did have a bit of cell phone difficulty. But, the thing I noticed the most was my emotional rawness and sensitivity. These huge infusions of light to our planet require huge openings within us in order to receive and integrate them. These light infusions are literally changing us down to our DNA. And, to go through this level of change to the core of our beings can be a bit stressful, to say the least.
I felt anxious and sad and hopeless and despairing. I cried and prayed and, as President Obama said in his speech last night, felt forced onto my knees because I had no where else to go. The plunger effect this level of light has on each and every one of us can make us feel crazy, like we're losing our grip on reality. And, we are. At least the old reality. So much of the past gets moved out of us so fast that the effect can be overwhelming. And, it all streams through our consciousness on its way out. That doesn't mean that we're necessarily conscious of all of it, but it's still moving through our system and triggering a response and/or a reaction.
I got caught up a bit in what was leaving as it was going last night. The emotions that were moving were so strong that it was hard not to get pulled into them. And, I momentarily forgot what was happening and wallowed for a while. I finally forced myself into bed and managed to sleep, although I had very active dreams for most of the night. This morning I feel better, and my presence of mind has returned and I'm able to see what was happening. These purges are not pleasant experiences. Necessary, yes. Pleasant, no.
I've always had an overlay of sadness my whole life. And, I've managed to get into some very hopeless and despairing states of mind. I'm much better now at not focusing on those emotions when they arise, but they can indeed still arise. They do still operate within me at times, and have their way with me at times, which is what happened last night. But, the good thing is that I now come back into consciousness much more quickly than I used to. I know these things are trying to move out of me, and I know they need to move out of me, and part of what makes it difficult is that they've been operating in me for so long that they're very familiar. I know them. They're like old friends. But, they're destructive old friends. They're the friends I have to let go of. They're the things that drag me down.
I've taken more healing classes and had more healing sessions than anyone I know. I've been to more psychics, heard more channels, and had more channeled sessions than anyone I know. My journey to "heal" myself has been extensive and widespread and expensive. I think much of it has helped, but much of it didn't. I have much more awareness through all I've learned and experienced, but the issues I've been working on are still active, and my body still exhibits the same physical symptoms. I used to think it was possible to "cure" myself. I thought it was possible to go in and remove specific energies from the system. I had a very aggressive idea about what healing was and what it could do. But, what's changed more than anything through this long journey is my understanding of what healing is and how it's facilitated. I now understand the level of surrender and acceptance and love that are required.
Cures are possible through energetic healing and do happen. But, they are less common than one would hope. It has to do with the receptivity and faith of those of us wanting to be healed; it has to do with the purity and skill of the healer; it has to do more with what we need than what we want. My healing journey has taken me all over the world, given me many amazing experiences, introduced me to many wonderful people, and shaped my life in ways that have been invaluable and beneficial. My spiritual path has opened through this healing journey. And, even though I still exhibit symptoms and have bouts of emotional instability and frailty, I am stronger and more aware on a soul level. Cures for the outward things have not occurred, but healing for the soul has. And, through my own pain and discomfort and despair, my heart has opened and compassion and understanding have grown. And, as difficult as it is sometimes to see physical affliction and emotional trauma as having a silver lining, it is true.
Humanity has historically grown through pain and adversity. When we are pressed by outward circumstances, we find the strength within. We've bonded through our pain. We've identified with our pain. We've held onto our pain and wrung every last drop from it. But, that time is at an end. The reason we're being so pushed by Life to let go of our past issues and limitations, is because they've served us as far as they're going to serve us. We're in the process of changing our basis of life, and the old ways of pain and adversity are losing their grip. We're being asked to open into a lighter way of living. We're being asked to bond through strength and love, not pain. We're being asked to identify with the purity of our souls and not our outer manifestations of pain. We're being asked to open into limitless possibilities instead of staying within our old limitations and feelings of inadequacy.
We're in the throes of a process that is birthing us into our greater yet to be. We're in the throes of a process that is birthing us into the fullness of our Christed selves. We are being transformed and lifted into the multidimensionality of who we really are. We're being given the chance to remember who we are as aspects of the One. And, as that process continues, we will go through some discomfort as we let go of the past and open to the now. We will forget sometimes what is really happening. We might lament and gnash our teeth at the difficulty of what is being asked of us. But, as we emerge from this process, unburdened and free and full of gratitude, we will realize that it's all been worth it.
Each one of us is here on this planet at this time and in these bodies in order to utilize the energies that are present to move ourselves forward as we assist the earth to move forward. We all volunteered to be here. We're all here for a reason and because we have something to heal and contribute. The gift of being here during the end of duality and the beginning of a whole new way of living as our planet ascends herself from the third dimension into the fifth, allowing us to go with her, is beyond anything any of us have ever experienced, and a gift that is impossible to truly comprehend. We are the galactic guinea pigs. We're the first collective of humanity to be given this chance. We're going where no one has gone before. We're the ones laying the track for those who will follow. We're the ones opening the door. We're the ones who will reach back and lift those behind us up.
Such a task is not easy, and we were never told it would be. But, when we said we'd come and be a part of it, we didn't care. We just wanted to be here, to participate in the grand experiment. So, no matter how difficult things get, or how much is required of us, it's important to remember that it's a gift to be here. It's important to remember that we are trail blazers. And, it's important to remember that no matter what happens, we will succeed in our missions. Hang in there. Be courageous. Remember why you're here and who you are.